More Coke Than Cola

For the better part of the last two years, the U.S. Men's National Team has rubbed elbows with the creme de la creme of the world's soccer powers. At the turn of the new year, the FIFA/Coca-Cola World Ranking listed the MNT as the number seven team in the world.

Since January the MNT has lost seven of its 767 points yet climbed to fourth, place ahead of three time world champions Germany(19) and Italy(14). And that's just the top 20, we'll get to the top ten later in the show.

In recent head to head competition the Germans then ranked 22nd met the MNT then ranked fifth in the world. Billed as a "friendly," there was nothing friendly about the match. Ze Deutsche were coming off a 4-1 drumbing at the hands of Italians then the 12th ranked team in the standings. The MNT on the other hand, was riding high after defeating the mighty Poles then ranked 26th. The line for that match was 1-0.

In their last pre-World Cup tune-up, the Germans were looking for blood. The buzz surrounding the match was that if ze Deutsche fell to the Yanks, it would be the gaffer Klinnsman's blood that they'd be looking for. Arena on the other hand thought that he could have-a-go at it across the pond with his MLS laden roster of last minute fill-ins. After all, a portion of his roster was filled out by European contingency of the MNT. How bad could it be? We go, we have a look around, have a brat or two, and oh yeah we'll stop in and kick the rock around.

For 45 minutes it wasn't bad, but the jury was still out. Too bad there was anther 45 yet to be played. In the second half the Germans drove thru the American defense as if they were Panzer tanks. Often out played and out classed it was clear that the MNT was no longer facing the CONCACAF minnows that it has come so used to feeding on. The final line for the match was 4-0. Afterward a punchy Arena declared "we never should have accepted this match." Gee Bruce, how do you figure? He later added "some players have taken themselves out of World Cup contention with their performance tonight." No s*#t Bruce!

Do you mean to tell me that the likes of Jimmy Conrad and Chris Klein aren't up to par with Michael Ballack and Bernd Schneider? And what about Greg Berhalter, did you actually think that this relic could contain ze Deutsche snipers? Buy a vowel Bruce! Dortmund wasn't the time to play a patch-work back line. Maybe next time a non-minnow calls to check on the squad's availability, someone in the brain trust might want to check if it falls on a international fixture date. This way, you don't have to rely on the jv team.

In the weeks since the nightmare at Dortmund, the MNT managed a tie against Jamaica. Again Bruce, gimme a break. Tony Meola! It gets better Steve Ralston and Pat Noonan, were Chelo and Tab not available? What about Cobi and Waldo? Did you think you were lining up opposite Ziggy and the Whailers? I thought the jv team was bad? What's even more frightening is that since then, the MNT is now ranked fourth in the world. In...the... World! This time ahead of two time champ Argentina(8), as well as former champions England(10), and France(7).

For those who thought the BCS was bad, I assure you the FIFA/Coca-Cola World Ranking is a greater hoax. Why you ask? Well take into consideration that the world ranking formula factors in your fixture results over the last eight years. Not to mention that your tournament pedigree factors in as well. What a sham. Lets face it, it's all about the Benjamins.

For much of the American public, soccer isn't on the radar. Sure America loves a Cinderella story, but what do Americans love more than a tear jerker? America loves a winner or at least a shot at a winner. Knowing that, Madison avenue will be watching closely and waiting in the wings, FIFA has once again waved its magic wand in order to bamboozel the American public into thinking that we have a shot at a winner. Lets face it, number four sounds better than seven. On paper we are only three spots away from the top of the heap.

If FIFA really thought that much about the standing of the MNT, then it might have been brighter to have seated the MNT rather than seating Mexico. Instead, the MNT must duke-it-out in group E (Italy, Ghana, Czech Republic) while our southern neighbors got a cake draw in group C (Iran, Angola, Portugal). After all, U.S. v Italy looks and sounds sexier than U.S. v Angola. You can bet the FIFA money machine is well aware of the marketing potential. Amazing that while we got worse, we got better.

FOOTNOTE

For more information, please visit:
FIFA/Coca-Cola World Ranking