My Blue Hell

My earlier assessment of Ned Colletti was correct; he still is on the Giants' payroll. In a move that resembles one of the better one's I've had in a while, the Dodger manager was able to flush the entire 2006 season down the toilet on Tuesday by dealing the sleepwalker, Odalis Perez, to the Royals for the proverbial bucket of baseballs, or in this case Elmer Dessens. As I stated earlier in my piece, Wake me when July Ends, the prospects of the Dodgers winning this season are slim to none, and slim just took a bullet to the head. So I guess you can wake me next season.

The Dodger woes began a series before the All-Star break, then apparently the 25 man roster decided to take an extended vacation that has seen them lose seven straight, and win only 1 game since the break. Apparently a note was found at Nomar's locker stating that he can be found at the same spring home in Havasu that Cedric Ceballos once vacationed at. In any case, the uninspired bunch have managed to make mediocre pitchers look like Vida Blue and Rollie Fingers, and the pitching has helped batters like Termell Sledge join the "Bash Brothers."

Am I pissed off, you're God damn right I am. I'm pissed because as usual I was drawn into this mess with the false promise of a winning season. "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!" I'm also pissed because of the attitude and half baked logic that flies out of the Dodger GM's pie hole. I was always taught that if you have nothing good to say, don't say anything at all. Applied to Colletti, he should just cut his tongue out to fend off temptation.

In a typical tap dance with the media, Colletti used the gem, "We aren't going to sacrifice the future for a 2-month rental," crap that flies in two bit cities that never expect to win. Unfortunately for this MENSA board member, Los Angeles isn't one of those towns. See, here in the city of angels, we like to think that our time is valuable, and the 2 and a half hours I spend watching this visual garbage on the television can be used to further other altruistic endeavors. Regardless, this year's team has managed to once again elicit disgust in the stomachs of true fans.

With that, Colleti made is pretty clear that he is not willing to mortgage the future on a guy like Greg Maddux, who can be an added upgrade in the rotation. Carlos Lee, yeah that great hitter for the Brewers that once had a 45 home run season with the ChiSox, he's not coming either because the Dodgers have devoted this season to the concept of trying to win by leaving runners in scoring position and grounding out into double plays. Apparently the team is striving for a special award at the end of the season for the team that has the fastest half of an inning, as illustrated by that Olympic record worthy performance on Monday night when Dodger hitters went down 1-2-3 in the sixth in a record 2:15 minutes. I thought the minute men were in Massachusetts.

So what is left for the average fan? Well, football season is around the corner, and although we don't have a team here in Los Angeles, I am sure that the average Dodger/Cowboy/Packer/Dolphin/Raider/Ram/49er/Eagle/Steeler fan will have something to take the place of that bleeding blue heart burn that leaves that sickening taste in your mouth, kind of like a vurp with a hint of snot.